Itisi

The nebulous ramblings; grammatical & punctuational experiments of a girl born on the fifth of November

Month: April, 2009

Ode to Oprah

Many words have been written and tweeted about Oprah’s controversial debut on Twitter, (although, apparently she is now bored with it) rather than reiterate what others have said, I decided to express my thoughts in (mediocre poetry) eloquent verse. Oh don’t roll your eyes – if WH Auden was around today he’d be writing this stuff. No, really!

Oh, Oprah, Oprah, Oprah,
Your name, it rhymes with … nothing.
(I tried to think of something
But the word just wasn’t there.)

You talk to me on tv.
Some days you seem much bigger,
On others you are smaller.
You quite often change your hair.

And now you come to Twitter
The regulars are angry,
Or maybe even twangry,
Because Oprah, you don’t care.

It’s not about you Oprah,
You really should be talking
To those folk who are forking
Out hard-earned cash for your wares.

So, Oprah, Oprah, Oprah,
Whose name it rhymes with nothing,
Start following or something.
Show the tweeters you play fair.

I appreciate you dropping by,
Please leave a comment, don’t be shy


No Comments by Kate on April 30, 2009
filed in Celebs, Twitter, poetry
tagged , ,

Правда ли то, что я сказал? or Was it something I said?

Although the 500th post on this blog appeared a few days ago, this is officially the 500th post by me, and I would like to take this opportunity to ask a question that has been puzzling me for some time: why don’t I ever get any visitors from Russia? I admit I don’t always check the stats but, as far as I can tell, not one Russian has ever dropped by. Since reinstalling the visitors map a few weeks ago (far sidebar) 564 people have visited, most from the UK and US – that’s to be expected given the subject matter on this blog and the demographics of the internet – but people do visit from other places too, except not Russia. Bahrain managed to rustle up a visitor, despite only having a population of 708,573; so did Malta from a population of 405,165; but not Russia, population 140,041,247.

Was it something I said? I’m pretty sure I’ve never written anything unpleasant about them, or even shared my thoughts about that strange, little Putin chap*. So, if you know any Russians, please ask them what I did to offend an entire country, because I’m intrigued. Whatever it was, it must have been terrible, but at the same time it’s quite an achievement; I mean, more than 140,000,000 people avoid me, but at least they know I exist.



* Tries too hard and his forename doesn’t suit him. I hear Vladimir and expect some tall, distinguished Omar Sharif type, instead I see a short, balding chap who looks like a malevolent hobbit.



I appreciate you dropping by,
Please leave a comment, don’t be shy




Indignant Tortoise Is So Itchy


I appreciate you dropping by,
Please leave a comment, don’t be shy


No Comments by Kate on April 29, 2009
filed in Completely Random
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